4 Ways To Stop Self-Sabotage in 2019

You can fail at absolutely anything in life. It’s a hard, but very real truth. You can try and try to do something you want to do, and you can fail it. This may sound like a way to get really depressed really quickly; why bother trying if you can fail? Well, you can spend your entire life worrying about the worst, but all that really matters is the choices you make right now. You can imagine an encyclopedia of ‘what if’ scenarios about the way that you choose to do things with your life, but until you try to do them, you won’t ever get anywhere. The things you REALLY want always seem out of reach: they’re not, but fear tells you that they are.

You can fail when you take the safe routes in life, checking all the boxes that people tell you that you should be checking. Career. Family. Savings. House. Wedding…..

All of these neat little boxes that people expect you to fill are the same boxes that fence you in. Some people rebel against the norms in a way that isn't always positive; turning to drugs or alcohol to escape from life. Self-sabotage in this way is different from living in the here now. Instead, this has a profound impact on your life in a way that isn't worth the risk. You can spend time going down the wrong path, with an outpatient drug rehab center in your future, or you can start succeeding at the things you are willing to take a risk on. Perhaps instead of the safe career your peers and parents have always guided you towards, you choose something you want to do instead. Perhaps instead of having children because society told you that you should, you choose not to.

You are very capable at undermining your own goals with self-sabotage, placing unnecessary limitations on your own abilities to live your dream. It’s time to stop doing that. Instead, you need to look at ways to stop your self-sabotage in 2019, and here are four ways to do just that:

  1. Figure out why you’re doing it. Some people head for sabotage without even noticing because they’re that used to it. You don’t have to be, though, even when it keeps you in your comfort zone. Once you realize why you’re going through the motions of sabotage, you can recognize the behaviors and stop.

  2. Practice positivity. In your mind, in your life, in your actions. Constantly talk to yourself in a positive way and you will drown out the negative inner voice telling you that you can’t do something, therefore you shouldn’t do it.

  3. Ignore others. Not literally, but ignore them as a benchmark to your own life. You do not have to compare yourself to someone else to be worthy of acceptance. You are wonderful; just as you are.

  4. Learn to look at your faults and mistakes and accept them. Being your own friend means you are going to practice kindness in the place that self-sabotage would once have been whispering in your ear. Ignore the voice and be the best friend you’ve ever had.


A Clean Financial Slate Is A Clean Headspace

You might have heard people say that a cluttered house leads to a cluttered mind. Well, the same goes for your finances. So, if you want to stop worrying about money then here are some suggestions to help you clean the financial slate and your headspace.

Sort out your regular expenses.

The best way to clean your financial slate is to sort out your regular expenses. Get back to the drawing board and think of smarter ways to spend your money. You don’t have to make cutbacks, however. Think about your groceries. You could use vouchers to save money or start growing vegetables in your back garden so you don’t need to buy them anymore. You could keep your house just as warm by insulating the windows rather than turning up the thermostat; that’d reduce your energy costs. You should also think about the monthly bill you face from your current phone provider. You might want to check out Boost Mobile phones for prepaid plans as opposed to postpaid plans. You could save yourself a lot of money and still get the same coverage. At the end of the day, that’s the key to sorting out your regular expenses. It’s about finding ways of buying the same things for less money. If you do your research then it’s easier than you think.

You might also want to start using financial apps to help you keep your monthly expenditures organized. If you struggle to maintain a clear and structured budget then this could be the perfect way to ensure you spend within your means. You wouldn’t have to worry about getting the math wrong. Additionally, apps can help you spend your money more wisely too; investment opportunities are always worth pursuing if you want to improve your long-term wealth. It’ll give you additional income on top of your existing salary. But we’ll talk more about the financial “long game” in the next point.

Think about the future.

Obviously, every financial decision you make has an impact on your future, so that’s probably always in the back of your mind. But if you want to really tidy up your finances and feel more confident about your money management then you should always be thinking about your financial security in the future. You might have a grip on your financial situation in the present day, but are you setting aside enough money for your retirement or whatever other expenses lie for you? You might think it’s too early to start thinking about that, but it’s never too early to start saving up. The sooner you start, the more wealth you’ll have acquired for your first house, a college fund for your kids, or even your retirement. If you’re still in your twenties then those ideas might hurt your head, but you’ll thank yourself for making preparations early in life.

You should also think about aspects of the future you can’t control. Starting a pension for your retirement is a safe and well-considered decision to make because you know you’re going to retire one day. But what about the costs that you can’t predict? Everybody faces unexpected hurdles such as car breakdowns or household damage. If you’re not prepared for those costs then it can end up taking a huge chunk out of your earnings and messing up your well-planned budget. So, your budget should always account for the unexpected. You should frequently set aside some of your savings for miscellaneous expenditures. You can call this your emergency fund.


How To Plan A Stylish Backyard Party

Although the weather is cooler in many parts of the country, that doesn’t mean you still can’t spend time outside and in your garden… especially in many southern cities as well as California.

Planning an outdoor party for this season may seem challenging, but I'm here to help. Start with a plan. Grab a pen and paper and let’s go.

Tackle the Garden

First things first. You need to tackle the garden. Decide whether you’re up for the challenge or whether you need to enlist some help. This could be in the guise of friends or a professional gardener.

If you’re doing this yourself, then start by raking up twigs, leaves and any rubbish. Next mow the lawns and tidy the borders. Make sure the edges are neat. Rake up any grass (dead or thriving) and move onto weeding. The sooner you tackle this, the better. Don’t give them time to take hold. Adding bark chips can discourage weeds from returning.

Once the garden is looking neat and tidy, you can move onto filling in the gaps with new plants. If you’re a low-maintenance gardener, then opt for plants that don’t need a lot of attention.

GrowDirect has plenty of affordable options to help you get your garden (or back yard) looking fabulous for your party. 

The Patio

Next move onto the patio. Again, start by raking and sweeping up after the winter. Remove leaves and other debris. Use a jet wash to clean the concrete. If you don’t have a lot of greenery, then consider adding a few colorful pots. Opt for plants that will flourish during this season.

The Fun Part

Now that the garden is taken care of, think about accessories such as fairy lights, outdoor candles and cushions. Have you thought of a theme? If so, make sure your accessories adhere to this. Rugs and beanbags are always useful as extra seating.

Food and Drink

Make a list of food and drink. Plan this in advance to allow you time to do the shopping and make preparations. If your party has a theme, then the food should be consistent. For example, if you’re throwing a traditional tea party then serve tea and cakes. If you have a Mediterranean theme, then shop accordingly.

Plan B

The problem with outdoor parties is that they depend on the weather. What will you do if it rains or snows? Create a plan B. Guests could always move into the house and you could hold the party there. Or, consider erecting a marquee for the event. This will allow your guests to remain outside without getting wet.

To recap, plan ahead and make sure you leave yourself plenty of time. Tackle the garden first and then move onto the decorations. If you have a theme then keep this in mind when decorating and organizing food. Don’t forget spare seating and have a plan B in case of bad weather. All that remains is to enjoy the day.


How You Can Still Hit Your 2018 Targets

You’ve probably caught yourself uttering phrases like “I can’t believe it’s November already,” “how is this year almost over already?” or “2018 has passed so quickly”. If you haven’t said them, you’ve almost certainly heard something similar, or seen it on a social media post. Yet, it shouldn’t really be a surprise, most of us feel the same at this time every year. As we get older, time seems to pass faster and faster, and it can feel very much as though it’s getting away from us.

But, instead of worrying about how little time there is left, or how little we have done with our year, why don’t we focus on the time that we have got left? There are still around eight weeks of 2018 left. That eight weeks might seem as though it will pass in a blur of parties, decorations, and shopping, but in reality, it’s as long as any other eight weeks of the year. It’s time to plan, to assess, to get things done. Use these eight weeks to focus on all those goals that you set yourself at the start of the year, instead of feeling like you’ve failed, and you’ll find that you’ve still got plenty of time to smash them.

Write Them Down

Did you write down your targets at the start of the year? If so, find them out, if not, remind yourself of what you wanted to achieve and write them down now. If it makes you feel better, include those that you’ve already reached and place a big satisfying tick next to them. Studies show that you are much more likely to get things done and hit your goals if they are written down, so place them somewhere that you can see.

Assess How You’ve Done

Look at those things that you haven’t managed to do yet. Ask yourself three questions. How far have you got? What has stopped you reaching your goals? And what do you need to do?

Set New Targets

This is the time to be realistic. Yes, you can still hit those targets that you set at the start of the year, you’ve got plenty of time. But, are they still relevant? Our needs change over time. Some of those goals might no longer be relevant to your life or career. You might have other requirements, and you certainly shouldn’t wait until the New Year if you want to tackle outpatient treatment programs or anything important. Don’t waste your time on things that no longer matter just so that you can say you’ve reached your goals for the year.

Make Each Day Count

This time of year is often hectic. With work, shopping, decorating and planning, you might not have as much time as you’d like to focus. So, make every day count. Fit in at least a small task every day, that will help you to get to where you need to be by the end of the year. Remember, every little step, is one in the right direction.


Taking A Relationship Slow Is When It's Serious

So many men and women want to rush into a relationship because they’re looking for security. In the modern day, even a 1 or 2-year relationship is still young and fresh. Several decades ago that’s all that was needed before marriage was put on the table. Not so now, because people live longer, we earn more money, we know what we want in life in terms of a career and life fulfillment, travelling etc. So things are now on the flip side, where relationships that take their time are the serious ones and those that only wait a couple of years before marriage and children are not. It's the polar opposite of every decade in the run-up to 2010. If you are still following the ABCs of relationships from way back when, you’re needlessly putting pressure on your partner. And in all honesty, it's our insecurities that make us want to push and push until we get an answer we like from them.

Taking it slow and letting things fall into place is much better.

Don’t have “the talk”

Both men and women do things in relationships that cause them to falter and eventually become unworkable. If your partner is not giving signs that they want the relationship to end, then don’t push them into a corner. If they aren’t cold toward you and showing less and less interest in your life, then why would you have ‘the talk’ with them? Far too often, we can feel like the relationship isn’t going anywhere, but if it's not going backwards it's always moving forwards. You can’t tie a man or woman down against their will, only when they are ready will they voluntarily want to take it to the next step. Marriage and having children is no walk in the park, and asking someone who you can one day see having both of those things with, “where is this going?” is only going to push them away. Commitment cannot be forced on someone, it has to be voluntarily given.

Signs of maturing

Most of the time, every couple wants their relationship to mature. This means both of you sort out the issues and challenges in your own lives before moving forward. This could mean figuring out what kind of career you want. It could mean paying off all your debt and becoming financially free. It could also mean your own emotional baggage. When these things have been taken care of, then we can move forward or at least show real signs that the relationship is maturing. But physical signs are often the most powerful, which is why promise rings are becoming more and more popular. They’re not quite an engagement ring, but it's a sign that you are on that path to eventually being proposed to and becoming a wife or husband. They come in both sexes as it's tradition to give each other the ring. Take it slow, and allow your relationship to mature naturally.

We all want to have some kind of security in our lives and sharing it with someone we love is even more desired. Just be careful to not push your partner into deciding to marry or have kids when they haven’t brought up the conversation themselves.


Disability Needn't Mean Reduced Productivity

When you’re involved in an accident that wasn’t your fault or afflicted by an illness, it can have long term and life-changing consequences. You may even be unable to continue in your present job or career. This can rob you of your long-term and short-term goals and even lead to a degree of identity crisis. For the seasoned professional or dynamic entrepreneur, a disability caused by unexpected illness or injury can feel like the end of your world. However, just because you are unable to continue on your present course does not mean that you are forever condemned to languish of what might have been. Many disabled people propel themselves into productive and financially rewarding careers either in new jobs or as freelancers.

Here are some tips to staying productive when affected by unexpected disability…

Get in touch with a disability lawyer as soon as possible

If you’re unable to work as a result of your disability, there’s a good chance that this will place a great deal of financial stress upon you. Not only is this the last thing you need when trying to launch a new business, enterprise or career, stress and anxiety can even impede your physical, emotional and psychological recovery. A long term disability lawyer contact can be a huge blessing in this scenario. They can work with you to prepare your claim to ensure that you will get all disability insurance you are entitled to and fight your corner should your claim be rejected. This will ease the financial pressure on you and allow you to keep the bills paid while you prepare yourself for a new career trajectory.

Pain and productivity

Your disability, whether it is a long or short term condition will more than likely lead to periods of pain and discomfort. These will, inevitably, impact upon your productivity. While it may be tempting to bemoan this or become frustrated by it, it’s far more conducive to your productivity simply to make your peace with it and resign yourself to the fact that some days you may be less productive and on other days you may struggle to get anything done at all. Factor this into your deadlines, organization and scheduling and you’ll be far better off. Any freelancer knows the danger of over-extending themselves and while it may seem counter-intuitive, being realistic with yourself and setting achievable goals will be far better for productivity than overreaching.

Managing your money

Whether you freelance or work for an employer, there will likely be a learning curve when it comes to money management. Some insurers, for example, may place a cap on how much you are able to earn which can lead to money management issues and the dreaded disability debt spiral.

It may be worth looking into ways in which you can consolidate or reorganize debts in order to make your monthly outgoings easier to manage. Remember also, that your new career change will likely incur some tax deductible expenses which will reduce your tax obligation leaving you with more income to invest back into your business and keep the wolf from the door.

With proper motivation and organization disability needn’t mean reduced productivity!


Everything You Need to Know About Emotional Support Animals

Generally speaking, humans and animals tend to live apart. We pass hundreds of animals on a daily basis. However, we tend live alongside them with little interaction. But then there are animals who we actively incorporate into our lives. Nine times out of ten, these animals will be pets. We offer them a comfortable home to live in, in exchange for their companionship, loyalty, and unconditional love. However, you will often find that different people rely on their pets to a different extent. Some treat them as pets. Others treat them as family. If you find that you have a particular bond with your pet and rely on them for emotional support on a regular basis, you could say that you have an emotional support animal. Read on for everything you need to know about this!

What Actually Is An Emotional Support Animal?

An emotional support animal, otherwise referred to as an “ESA”, is a companion creature who actively provides their owner or handler with emotional support that can significantly improve their overall health, happiness, and wellbeing. In order for an animal to be officially recognized as an emotional support animal, they will have to be signed off by a psychiatrist, psychologist or other qualified health practitioner. This individual will verify that this pet’s presence is necessary for you to maintain a good quality of life. You can then enroll your pet as an ESA and receive official documents to confirm this through certa pet.

Can My Pet Be an ESA?

ESAs tend to be most beneficial for individuals who suffer from some sort of physical, psychiatric, or intellectual problem or disability. If you fall into this category, your pet may be an ESA. There are no species specific requirements for ESAs. While dogs tend to be the most common form of emotional support animal, any animal can qualify. So, if you have a cat, bird, or even a more alternative pet such as a hedgehog, these could all count.

How Can I Benefit from ESA Certification?

There are certain situations in life where you could potentially be separated from your pet. This, of course, could be extremely traumatic if you have a special bond. ESA certification can help to guarantee that you and your pet can remain together. Say you move into a privately leased house and the landlord may say that they have a no pets policy. An ESA certificate can be used to ensure that your pet is allowed in the house, regardless of the no pets policy. An ESA certificate can also be used to ensure that your pet can travel with you on airlines that may otherwise exclude pets from the cabin.


This is just a brief introduction to emotional support animals. Hopefully, it has proven useful, and you can put the information to good use if you have an animal of your own who offers you emotional support in your life!


Treat Yo'self (on a budget)

The concept of treating yourself and engaging in self-care has become increasingly popular over recent years, and for good reason. The need to focus on health and mental well-being cannot be overestimated, especially in a busy world that relentlessly places extra demands on your time and energy. A societal change that encourages people to focus on themselves and their own happiness has long been due.

However, there is one downside to the self-care, treat yo’ self phenomenon; it’s that many of the methods employed to do this are downright expensive. Go out for a meal with friends; get a massage; have your nails done… all wonderful ideas, but all demanding on your finances. In fact, you were to engage in this kind of self care on a regular basis, it wouldn’t be long until you were having to visit the likes of https://debtconsolidation.co in an effort to manage your beleaguered finances - which wouldn’t be much of a ‘treat’.

There’s no denying that treating yourself and indulging in self-care are beneficial, however, so how can you introduce these concepts into your life without ruining your finances? Here are a few ideas.

#1 - Switch your phone off

We spend our lives tethered to our phones, instantly contactable by a variety of people, and exposed to an endless stream of information. While undeniably useful, the harm caused by this relentless connectivity cannot be underestimated; it can lead to addiction, and creates a sense that you’re always “on”, needing to be ready to respond if someone reaches out to you. Under these conditions, relaxation can be incredibly difficult.

To counter this, turn your phone off the moment you get home from work. You can warn your closest friends and family of this decision, so they know they will need to actively visit in an emergency, then switch your phone off, and enjoy a little mental space to yourself.

#2 - Go for a walk

It may sound simple - perhaps too simple to really be of any use - but going for a walk really is one of the best methods of free self-care you can experience. As https://www.rd.com/ points out, going for a walk has a range of benefits that few conventional self-care measures could ever come close to replicating, so it’s well worth giving it a go.

#3 - Use your vacation days

As discussed on https://www.marketwatch.com/, studies have shown that over half of US citizens don’t use all of their work vacation days. This is a real shame, as time off from work is essential for managing your mental health and sense of well-being. To truly treat yourself, keep track of your vacation days and note when they expire; if the year is running out, treat yourself to a few days off - you’ve worked to obtain those days, so you definitely deserve to enjoy them.


In conclusion: As the points above prove, treating yourself and pursuing self-care doesn’t have to cost the earth. The tips above cost precisely $0, but will have a huge impact on your overall health and well-being.


3 Tips for Saving Money.... and Boost your Well-being at the Same Time

Money is, by all accounts, one of those things that you just never feel like you have quite enough of. At the same time, however, there are all kinds of things in life more valuable than money. Our personal well-being is one of those things. If you can go through life relatively happy and stress-free, you’re likely to have the envy of a large number of the people you meet on a daily basis, who haven’t yet cracked the secret.

If, however, you could improve your own well-being while simultaneously saving a bit of money, that’d be the cherry on top, wouldn’t it?

Here are a few tips for saving money and boosting your well-being at the same time.

Workout outside in nature

Research has found, consistently, that people who spend more time outdoors in nature are happier, healthier, and have a better overall experience of life, than those who either stay indoors or remain surrounded by concrete, glass and steel for the majority of their lives.

In fact, one amazing study even found that people recovering in hospital would recover faster and maintain better spirits, if they could see a single tree from the window of their room. Nature is a big deal, and it seems to have a lot of power to improve our quality of life. Luckily enough, nature is also, for the most part, free.

Regular exercise is another one of those lifestyle activities which has been shown time and time again to boost health, happiness, and energy. 

The logical conclusion here is pretty straightforward — cancel your gym membership and enjoy more of your workouts outdoors, in natural environments. Your local park can be a great option.

Use financial management apps

Money management is probably one of the all-time leading causes of stress out there, and money mismanagement is without a doubt the leading cause of financial waste and economic misery.

Anything that you could do which would enable you to handle your money, better, and with less stress, would have the potential to be a serious game-changer.

Financial management apps are that game-changer. Personal budgeting software like YNAB can save you from spending your paycheck absentmindedly, while a good personal capital app can help you to invest wisely.

Sell your old outfits before buying new ones

This tip isn’t strictly for everyone, and it’s not necessary to get rid of all of your old outfits. Obviously you’ll likely have classic or useful clothes which you’ll want to hold on to.

Nonetheless, however, selling your old outfits on eBay before buying new ones can free you from a mountain of stress and irritation, while also saving your bank account a lot of strain, for a couple of straightforward reasons.

Firstly, selling your old outfits will limit the number of clothes you have at any one time, which will also reduce some of the anxiety that comes from struggling to choose what to wear.

Secondly, selling your old outfits will help to raise money for your new ones, and you won’t just be caught in a constant consumer cycle.


What are your go-to tips for saving money?


Changing How We View Cancer Treatment

There are few things in life that are more devastating than hearing that a loved one has cancer. However, it seems that very few of us are destined to go through life without knowing at least one friend or family member who receives a cancer diagnosis. As challenging as a this can be, there have been a lot of advances in research made within the past few years. Many patients find themselves in outpatient settings, which can be much more convenient and less expensive than sitting in a hospital. But this can also be a bit alienating to someone who may be experiencing massive physical and mental strains on a daily basis. The one thing that studies have proven—over and over again—is that having an emotional support system can be a key component for someone who is undergoing treatment for cancer.

People are usually mistaken in believing that their loved one constantly want to discuss their treatment regimen or other aspects of their diagnosis. In this regard, you will want to let them lead the way. Chances are that if they’ve just been to chemotherapy this week, they may want to talk about something else. They may want to go see a movie or just hang out and drink tea. Being part of someone’s support system doesn’t necessarily have to be a heavy responsibility. Checking in on your friend periodically, asking them if they want you to bring them something, may be all that they need. Every case is different, so don’t assume that a loved one’s journey is the same as another’s. Try to be as considerate as you can possibly be; realize that your calendar might not work for them, so try to call them when they have some time to talk. Ask if they need help with chores or errands. You don’t have to break the bank helping someone; many times, the most helpful tasks do not require money. If your loved one’s appearance is different, try not to reveal your emotions about how they look. Remember that cancer may seem a lot worse than it is during certain portions of treatment.

Some organizations have dedicated a great deal of time and funding to the cause, such as the Lefkofsky Foundation. As the co-founder of Tempus, Eric Lefkofsky is a visionary who believes that cancer treatment needs to be brought into the 21st century. With an astute business sense, his endeavors have often been very high-profile, and his somewhat recent foray into the medical field is no different. Tempus is considered a “unicorn” fund, attracting an extraordinary level of investment from heavy hitters in the marketplace. Everyone recognizes that the need for better and more advanced cancer care should be a top priority in our society, and Lefkofsky agrees. 

Tempus wants to make it easier for physicians to do the simple things that will enhance their patients’ lives, such as digitizing clinical and molecular data for cancer. With Lefkofsky leading the charge, everyone is hopeful that real results will be generated.